Episode 3: Zhi Xi by Ambivalently Yours

Welcome to the third episode of Rebelliously Tiny. Here’s this week’s question: “Hi, so as a high school student, I come in contact with misogyny, rape jokes, and overall sexist things quite often. I do my best to stop the person making the comment and tell them why what they said was wrong, but most people just call me a crazy bitch. I'm known in my school as the loud mouthed feminist. Why are people, high schoolers esp, so scared to learn about feminism versus treating it like a joke?”  

 

This week, our guest Zhi Xi talks with us about high school. We question whether feminism is taken seriously as a topic in high school, why it should be, and where else teenagers might have the chance to learn about feminism and social justice. Zhi Xi talks about useful spaces on the Internet and social media where much of this learning occurs. She also touches upon the complicated aspects of celebrities using their platform to raise awareness about social justice issues and why feminism has to be intersectional. Ambivalently Yours and Zhi Xi relate about embracing feminism and the struggles that can come along with being labeled the “feminist killjoy.”  

*Content Warning: discussions of racism and sexism, mentions of police violence

A podcast by Ambivalently Yours
Co-produced by Hannah McCasland

Recorded at (with their technical and financial support) Oboro Arist-Run Center in Montreal
Technical support: Stéphane Claude
Music: Greg Barkley

Episode 2: Lux by Ambivalently Yours

Welcome to episode 2 of Rebelliously Tiny.

Here’s this week’s question: “hi sweetheart, i need to talk about something. a few months ago, i started questioning my sexuality because i had a crush on one of my same-sex friends. i had tried to discover my sexuality a couple times before, but i kept thinking that i was straight. now, im not sure. my main problem is that i dont know whether my thoughts are real, or if im just doing this because of one crush. ive already talked about this to some friends who are lgbt+ themselves, but im so scared that i might just be imagining all of this, and that i offended my friends whose feelings are actually real. i wouldnt have a problem with being gay, bi, pan, straight or whatever; i just have a problem with not knowing if what i feel is real. thanks for listening, i love your blog a lot!!”  

We were lucky to have Lux help us answer our question this week. Ambivalently Yours met Lux at a drawing workshop, and has since been inspired by their use of social media to start conversations. We talk with Lux about sexuality, race, gender, and how to navigate difficult, intimate and important discussions about tough issues. We learn a lot from Lux and along the way we laugh about Gilmore Girls and first crushes.

*Content Warning: discussions of racism, police violence

A podcast by Ambivalently Yours
Co-produced by Hannah McCasland

Recorded at (with their technical and financial support) Oboro Arist-Run Center in Montreal
Technical support: Stéphane Claude
Music: Greg Barkley

Episode 1: Hannah by Ambivalently Yours

Welcome to the first episode of Rebelliously Tiny, a podcast where each week a special guest helps artist Ambivalently Yours respond to one of the thousands of personal questions she’s received on social media.

Here’s this week’s question: “I'm at the point in my life where I have to absolutely grow up. Yet I don't know where I want to go or what I want to do. And the thought of the future terrifies me because I'm expected to be all sorted already but how am I supposed to when I don't even know what I want myself? I just feel like I can’t breathe- the pressure is overwhelming and I wish I knew what to do with my life as it moves on forward. I wanna be happy with my long term decisions, I just don't want to make them right now.”

This week we introduce Co-Producer Hannah McCasland, who worked behind the scenes with Ambivalently Yours to help put this podcast together. While researching questions to use on the show, one of them in particular resonated with Hannah and how she was feeling at the time, as a student about to graduate from college and step out into an uncertain future. In this episode, we talk about the pressures of decision-making, talking to your family about your plans, and how different privileges and identities can play into these issues. We also discuss Ambivalently Yours’ artistic career and try to figure out how to reconcile our passions with our practical circumstances.

A podcast by Ambivalently Yours
Co-produced by Hannah McCasland

Recorded at (with their technical and financial support) Oboro Arist-Run Center in Montreal
Technical support: Stéphane Claude
Music: Greg Barkley

Welcome to Rebelliously Tiny by Ambivalently Yours

Welcome to Rebelliously Tiny, a podcast about the subtle emotions that draw us together. For the last five years, artist Ambivalently Yours has been exploring her ambivalence and feminist questions by posting pink drawings on her Tumblr blog. Eventually, people started responding to the work by sharing their personal stories and asking her for advice, often anonymously. Since Ambivalently Yours felt in no way qualified to tell anyone what to do, she began answering these messages with ambivalent drawings. Today, she has over 1000 messages waiting in her inbox, and has decided to ask for a little help responding to them. Each episode of this podcast will focus on one question, which Ambivalently Yours will discuss with someone she admires and trusts. Their goal will not be to provide answers, but to explore the tender emotions we are often told are unimportant, while highlighting the value of talking to each other instead of about each other. Each episode will also feature a drawing inspired by both the initial question and the conversation it sparked. In a world that teaches us that strength is loud, harsh and masculine, this is a place for those of us whose struggle is both impossibly large and rebelliously tiny. 

A podcast by Ambivalently Yours
Co-produced by Hannah McCasland

Recorded at (with their technical and financial support) Oboro Arist-Run Center in Montreal
Technical support: Stéphane Claude
Music: Greg Barkley